Wednesday, September 26, 2007


In this world of Christian crap and Jesus junk, I think I am going to go to the dollar store and buy some toothbrushes made by hard working Chinese people and paint crosses on them. Then call them Truthbrushes and sell them on a web site. I could sell some Jesus bobbleheads and He-Brews beer

Of course I am not serious but I bet someone could do just that and people would buy it

One More Post - Corvallis Open Forum

I overslept Saturday and didnt make it. This weekend we are going to be out of town. After that I am going back.

I dont know shit

This post may make no sense but it may. When I was 23, I thought I knew everything. My mothers boyfriend (in his late forties) told me I didnt but he thought he did. He said I was young dumb and full of c*m. Well I know now that at 23, I didnt know shit but here is the dilemma. If people in their late forties know everything and teenagers know everything than I can say with confidence that at 35, I dont know shit. I will be glad when I hit 45 and regain all the knowledge I had at 18.

Of course this post is full of sarcasm. I guess the point is a lot of older people think they know a lot from experience. Younger people are too inexperienced to know they dont know.

I am old enough to know I dont know but not old enough to have the experience.

Welcome to the void of the mid thirties

Predatory Capitalism

This is the word I was looking for. Predatory Capitalism. This is the practice of squashing the little guy to line your pockets.

Here is a thought, publicly traded corporations have a legal responsibility to their shareholders to maximize profits at any cost. Doesnt the nature of this beast create predatory capitalism by nature. Dont they have to lie, cheat, squish, outsource, steal, destroy, live and die for the bottom line?

Is this not pure evil?

As far as non predatory capitalism (the little guy with the good idea) thats a different beast

I watched the high cost of low price last night. Robert Greenwald is no Michael moore. It was boring but made a point.

Thank God I dont work for a publicly traded company.

I believe there needs to be regulation to stop these beasts from ruining, raping, and pillaging the world.

Also another topic, Health Care. Its a right and cannot be humanely managed by a soul-less for profit corporation.

I am to the point that Dennis Kucinich is the only presidential candidate I can stand> He has no chance of winning but I am going to vote for him anyway

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Words I cannot stand

This is a simple post but its on my mind. Here are some word I loathe. Anybody wanna add some

Badonkadonk (or however the hell you spell it)
Sowing seeds (in a religious sense)
Crib (for a home)
Ride (for a car)
Pimp (for anything other than a prostitute's manager)
Any sports originated term in a non sports sense (or sports sense for that matter)
Right-size (company)
800 pound gorilla (or 900 if hes really big)
Turnkey (sounds like turkey to me)
Deal (with regard to sales of any kind especially cars)
Any misused computer anatomy term (hard drive for computer, etc)
plugged-in (in a religious sense)
download (in a religious sense)

I guess I hate any term that gets stolen from another thing

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Things we can do?

Some suggestions of things we can do. Some of these are not my own but came from the briliant minds of Corvallis Open Forum. Some are original. I am NOT claiming that I will be doing all of them. I may not be able to.

1) Boycott Christmas - Dont pad the pockets of evil corporations buy not buying ANY Christmas presents this year

2) Buy NOTHING the day after Thanksgiving. Dont buy anything at all that day. Pretend the stores are gone

3) dont go to work on Election day. dont buy crap. Just dont do anything. Stick it to the man.

4) Here is a modification of 1. If you must Christmas shop, buy only from small local businesses

5) TOTALLY BOYCOTT all multinational and/or publicly traded corporations for the entire holiday season. This is hard. I am considering it.

6) Dont buy new high dollar items. Cars and computers are the worst investment anyone can make. Car companies are highly corrupt. Computer companies (with some exceptions arent much better). Buy used cars from INDIvIDUALS (no need to line the pockets of dealers). Buy (or aquire from previous owners) used computers. Run free software. Dont add to Bill Gates bottom line.

7) Most importantly. GIVE A DAMN. Dont say one person cant make a difference. If a lot of one persons give a damn, it will make a difference

Thursday, September 13, 2007


I watched part of Sicko (the new Michael Moore movie) last night. I had to shut it off because I got so pissed off at the insurance companies.

Shouldnt I be more content to accept capitalism now that I am older and could benefit from it. Why do I become more and more outraged.

another thing is tonight I went to a dinner for the home care workers union (my wife is a home care worker for my mom of all people). They were all excited about how great their insurance is from Kaiser Permanente. Then the guy goes on to say he believes in affordable healthcare for all and that we need to elect people who will provide it. In another sentence he said Kaiser is good because they are pro union. Well they are still greedy pigs who let people die to increase their bottom line.

I think I need to get drunk and watch the rest of Sicko. I want to see him go to Cuba but I just couldnt deal with it anymore. I needed rest and sleep.

anyway my mindless rambling for tonight.

Hmmm. Thats waht blogs r for

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

More about cannibal pup. Its a dog eat dog world

OK. I may have jumped the gun with that last post. I was pissed and I made an assumption that cannibal dog food must be true and must be fueled by corporate greed. Further research I have found the following:

1) The FDA has investigated this. Others have too. There is compelling evidence that euthanized animals have at some point ended up in dog food.

2) The wild stories about trucks carrying dead dogs to the rendering plants and vets asking do you want your dog rendered seem far fetched and may be urban legends. Though sources like Snopes dont seem to touch the issue

3) What has been proven repeatedly is that there is a presence of phenabarbitol (the main drug used to put down animals) in a percentage of the dog and cat food supply. How it got there, nobody knows. Many speculate.

Here are my thoughts. The conspiracy theory side of me wants to buy this as truth. The practical side wants to say another urban legend. I think I will switch my dog to foods from companies that allow me to know whats really in it.

Is there dead dog and cat in dog and cat food? I dont know.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

My Doggy is a Cannibal?

My mom was very distraught when I got home tonight and said she read that 12% of many dog and cat foods are made from the bodies of euthanized dogs and cats. In addition roadkill is often used. Now hoping this was some awful urban legend I hit the net. Looked at snopes. Found nothing. Did find many web sites that seem to confirm that this is true. I nearly puked when I read this (shouldnt have done this while eating dinner).

I am fed up. Freaking corporate capitalist pigs. They poison us with crap from china. They feed my dog dead dog and cat meat. all anyone seems to give a fsck about is the bottom line. I am sick of it. I want to go out and live in the woods and eat plants. FSCK the bottom line. FSCK capitalism.

I hope the rich corporate assholes get to eat Soylent Green for dinner when they lose all their money.


We visited a Church this week. Its the Mennonite Church that I have told some of you about. Here is what I noticed

I almost couldnt keep a straight face with the amount of Christianese being spoken. It was amusing to me. I know its irreverant but I nearly laughed my ass off.

The emphasis on money and borderline name it and claim it theology almost made me hurl chunks.

After the worship the emotions were charged and maybe I felt the Spirit. Not sure. I went up front. Wanting more than anything to feel God. Wanting more than anything to have the feelings that I had. I got down on the altar in front and begged God for it but didnt feel the fullness I was used to. I am not saying I didnt feel a peace, but it was in the midst of turmoil. I thought something was terribly wrong with me. I should be in the spirit but it was weak. I am not saying I didnt feel anything but the intensity was not there. Now good Christians would tell me that I am not right with God. Even my wife seemed to get more out of it.

I had my spiritual experience and felt near to God later in the day on the beach in Pac City. There I felt peace.

You could say I got inspired. How about a Church that instead of preaching has an open forum like the Corvallis open forum.l Maybe sing a song or two and EVERYONE gets to speak their mind and the whole Church HAS TO LISTEN and CANNOT JUDGE THEM. HMMM. I wonder if it coudl work. Anyway Ibetter get going. My wife will probably read this and think I am "falling away from God" because I dare to admit that I didnt feel that much in Church. I know I am not though. God seems right there to me now.

Pacific City

Sunday we went to Pacific City to a party at my wifes college. (her college isnt there but the party was. Here are a couple of pics of the area and one of me.

Corvallis Open Forum

I briefly touched on it but I wanted to say that Corvallis Open Forum had a profound affect on my wife and I. We went with the intention of taking it all in and not speaking, but she decided to go and I felt I had something to add. I think going to this could be very beneficial to us and hopefully we can add something of worth to it.

For those outside the area, Corvallis Open Forum is a group of people who meet in a park near the Farmers Market and share ideas. Each person can talk for 4 minutes. They treat all with respect and you can say what you want.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Better Day

Today is a better day. All the sh*t from Friday blew over. Three experiences took place this weekend that were interesting and I promise to blog about all three later.

1) Corvallis open forum. It was a lot of fun. It was nice to meet Crallspace and Tim Nam in person and to hear others opinions. The really cool thing was I felt like I could speak and not be judged at all by these people. Really cool. I will talk more later

2) Church. I went to Church Sunday and had very mixed emotions but got inspired with a crazy idea that I must blog about later

3) Trip to Pacific City. I had forgotten now that I dont live on the Coast just how renewing the ocean is to the soul. Though we went for a college beach party, I walked away and truly found peace and connection to God. Better than Church. I will post pictures later.

anyway that was my weekend in a nutshell. Too many thoughts to go into detail at work.

Friday, September 07, 2007

Roller Coaster. Positivity on hold until next week

I meant to be positive. I really did then I make a slight mess up and I know I made my boss mad today. I wont get fired but it was a small thing with a big consequence. Right now I feel like cutting and running. Maybe if I could go elsewhere I could live it down. Maybe in a week or so they will forget. all I know is at most jobs I am liked but cannot ever live down my weaknesses even if I go the opposite extreme and be the best whatever I can.

I dont know. Feeling tired and burnt out tonight. Not as bad as before. Just feel like its all the same.

Anyway, nobody get depressed. its all OK. Just needed to vent out and whine a bit. thats what blogs are for

More Enneagram

This thing is cool. I ordered and got the books to go with it and took the 144 question test. My results were different. I tested out as a type 4 with 6 and 9 close behind. Now I need to read the rest of the books and see the rest of the Enneagram and what it means.

So if any of you took that test I linked to on previous post, I am not sure how accurate it was.

I will find myself soon

Tuesday, September 04, 2007


I took a personality test called the Enneagram that was highly recommended to me. I thought I would post my results and see if anyone else has any insight to what this means. Its about what I thought. Like a blackbear (or spiritbear) I am reclusive

Image Icon results:
Main Type
Overall Self
Take Free Enneagram Personality Test
Scale (|||||||%) results:
Enneagram Test Results
Type 1 Perfectionism |||||| 26%
Type 2 Helpfulness |||||||||||||||||||| 90%
Type 3 Image Focus |||||||||||||||||| 78%
Type 4 Hypersensitivity |||||||||||||||| 70%
Type 5 Detachment |||||||||||||||||| 74%
Type 6 Anxiety |||||||||||||||||| 78%
Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||||||| 54%
Type 8 Aggressiveness |||| 14%
Type 9 Calmness |||||||||||||||| 66%
Your main type is 2
Your variant is self pres
Take Free Enneagram Personality Test


My wife (aka whitewolf28) and I tried doing a podcast for a while and my former employer was nice enough to kill the site. I dont know if anyone ever listened to it. I am pondering starting up a podcast again and maybe getting guests to call in. Something like SCP only not. I guess I wonder and am interested in feedback. If I start a podcast, would anyone listen to it?

I would keep the episodes to 20 minutes or less for time sake.

Saturday, September 01, 2007

Greetings from Seattle

Hey I havent posted for a while. Been busy with work, helping my mom out and just generally tired and fried.

I came up here for the weekend to visit my dad.

I have been in Oregon too long. I feel like I am in a huge city. Its overwhelming but cool at the same time.

Today was cool. I met up with Ninjanun and the Pete at Starbucks. We talked for hours though it didnt seem like a long time. It was really cool to talk to some people who see the Church (and political) thing much the way I do. They seem like great people. Very real. I was starting to feel alone in the world of unchurchy Christianity but now I feel better.

A lot of my posts have been negative. I think I will go back and try to see the good in life. I have a good job. Oregon is a reasonably good place to live (though Albany still sucks and always will). Life is generally good though.

Regardless. This is probably quite boring to read but I see a new hope regarding things. Suddenly, I want to do something about all the fscked up things I see instead of whine about it. I DEFINITELY NEEDED A VACATION and this is closest thing I have had in nearly a year.

I will post more often too. Even if there isnt anything exciting.