Thursday, December 13, 2007

Helpless Feeling

Today I got a call at work. Not a call anyone ever wants to get. My mom had to be rushed to the hospital. All they would tell me was chest pains. She apparently had trouble breathing.

I left work and established new land speed records in my little Ford Ranger and got to the hospital. For an hour they wouldnt even tell me if she was there. finally they ease my panic and say she has pneumonia. This is a relief. I assume all will be well with some antibiotics.

Later they start ordering test and answer questions about as completely as the Bush Administration. I happened to read a piece of paper with the words "possible PTE". What the fsck is that and why wont anyone tell me whats going on. I calmly leave and said goodnight to my mom who was highly sedated and doing better.

I look up PTE and find out its a blood clot in the lung and is fatal between 8 and 30% of the time. Tomorrow my mom who has been thru hell today will find out what a PTE is. She may well not have a PTE but I am panicked, scared, depressed and worried.

My faith is not holding up well but I have been praying my heart out.

I am frustrated by the nincompoops at the hospital who wont say anything. They should at least tell us wtf is going on.

I hope and pray its nothing. Anyone who prays, I would appreciate any extra prayers you have around.

The other disturbing factor is her symptoms arent new and her primary doctor says, its nothing.

I am mad at the health care system. Honestly I feel like a scared little child whose parents are keeping a dark secret from them.

Anyway, blogs are for venting. I will post what happens.

2 comments:

Nina said...

i pray for your mother for a full and quick recovery and for the docs and nurses to determine just what exactly she is dealing with and to share all information.

it's frustrating. very frustrating. even with less serious cases, health care professionals, overall, simply don't share as they could and need to. ask those questions until you feel they have been answered.

tkn said...

hang in there Spiritbear,

I'm praying for your family also.