My Doggy is a Cannibal?

My mom was very distraught when I got home tonight and said she read that 12% of many dog and cat foods are made from the bodies of euthanized dogs and cats. In addition roadkill is often used. Now hoping this was some awful urban legend I hit the net. Looked at snopes. Found nothing. Did find many web sites that seem to confirm that this is true. I nearly puked when I read this (shouldnt have done this while eating dinner).

I am fed up. Freaking corporate capitalist pigs. They poison us with crap from china. They feed my dog dead dog and cat meat. all anyone seems to give a fsck about is the bottom line. I am sick of it. I want to go out and live in the woods and eat plants. FSCK the bottom line. FSCK capitalism.

I hope the rich corporate assholes get to eat Soylent Green for dinner when they lose all their money.

Church

We visited a Church this week. Its the Mennonite Church that I have told some of you about. Here is what I noticed

I almost couldnt keep a straight face with the amount of Christianese being spoken. It was amusing to me. I know its irreverant but I nearly laughed my ass off.

The emphasis on money and borderline name it and claim it theology almost made me hurl chunks.

After the worship the emotions were charged and maybe I felt the Spirit. Not sure. I went up front. Wanting more than anything to feel God. Wanting more than anything to have the feelings that I had. I got down on the altar in front and begged God for it but didnt feel the fullness I was used to. I am not saying I didnt feel a peace, but it was in the midst of turmoil. I thought something was terribly wrong with me. I should be in the spirit but it was weak. I am not saying I didnt feel anything but the intensity was not there. Now good Christians would tell me that I am not right with God. Even my wife seemed to get more out of it.

I had my spiritual experience and felt near to God later in the day on the beach in Pac City. There I felt peace.

You could say I got inspired. How about a Church that instead of preaching has an open forum like the Corvallis open forum.l Maybe sing a song or two and EVERYONE gets to speak their mind and the whole Church HAS TO LISTEN and CANNOT JUDGE THEM. HMMM. I wonder if it coudl work. Anyway Ibetter get going. My wife will probably read this and think I am "falling away from God" because I dare to admit that I didnt feel that much in Church. I know I am not though. God seems right there to me now.

Pacific City

Sunday we went to Pacific City to a party at my wifes college. (her college isnt there but the party was. Here are a couple of pics of the area and one of me.

Corvallis Open Forum

I briefly touched on it but I wanted to say that Corvallis Open Forum had a profound affect on my wife and I. We went with the intention of taking it all in and not speaking, but she decided to go and I felt I had something to add. I think going to this could be very beneficial to us and hopefully we can add something of worth to it.

For those outside the area, Corvallis Open Forum is a group of people who meet in a park near the Farmers Market and share ideas. Each person can talk for 4 minutes. They treat all with respect and you can say what you want.

Better Day

Today is a better day. All the sh*t from Friday blew over. Three experiences took place this weekend that were interesting and I promise to blog about all three later.

1) Corvallis open forum. It was a lot of fun. It was nice to meet Crallspace and Tim Nam in person and to hear others opinions. The really cool thing was I felt like I could speak and not be judged at all by these people. Really cool. I will talk more later

2) Church. I went to Church Sunday and had very mixed emotions but got inspired with a crazy idea that I must blog about later

3) Trip to Pacific City. I had forgotten now that I dont live on the Coast just how renewing the ocean is to the soul. Though we went for a college beach party, I walked away and truly found peace and connection to God. Better than Church. I will post pictures later.

anyway that was my weekend in a nutshell. Too many thoughts to go into detail at work.

Roller Coaster. Positivity on hold until next week

I meant to be positive. I really did then I make a slight mess up and I know I made my boss mad today. I wont get fired but it was a small thing with a big consequence. Right now I feel like cutting and running. Maybe if I could go elsewhere I could live it down. Maybe in a week or so they will forget. all I know is at most jobs I am liked but cannot ever live down my weaknesses even if I go the opposite extreme and be the best whatever I can.

I dont know. Feeling tired and burnt out tonight. Not as bad as before. Just feel like its all the same.

Anyway, nobody get depressed. its all OK. Just needed to vent out and whine a bit. thats what blogs are for

More Enneagram

This thing is cool. I ordered and got the books to go with it and took the 144 question test. My results were different. I tested out as a type 4 with 6 and 9 close behind. Now I need to read the rest of the books and see the rest of the Enneagram and what it means.

So if any of you took that test I linked to on previous post, I am not sure how accurate it was.

I will find myself soon