PAX (Penny Arcade Expo)

Today I went to a gaming convention which is something I have never done. I was a gamer back in the 80s and 90s but I have not been that into it recently. This was a really cool event though. Lots of cool people. I tried out some fun games. I actually liked the shoot em up kind of games the best (which is weird since i dont like war) Perhaps war simulation is OK as long as its fake. Anyway, it was a new experience and a lot of fun. I think I may go to all three days of it next year. I might get into gaming again between now and then which will make it better. It wasnt as geeky as the startrek convention I went to once. That truly was an experience many years ago.

I also got together with Ninjanun and the Pete. They were at PAX as well. Afterward we went out for dinner. I always have a great time talking with them. They seem to some of the few people I know that actually get it when it comes to religion. I think if I lived up here we would hang out a lot.


This is my last night here in Seattle. Tomorrow its back to Oregon. Tuesday I go back to slavery (uhh I mean work).

I know I have gotten a bit out there on this blog lately but I am getting more balance. This trip is exactly what I needed.

I miss my wife and it will be good to see her though

In Seattle

I am in Seattle this long weekend visiting my dad. It was a long traffic filled drive up here but its nice to get away for a few days. This is a low stress environment. Dont know what all I am gonna do. Might hook up with some friends if schedules permit.

I am feeling peaceful and content right now.

The Day After

Well now its the day after but the minute after I concocted the monstrosity before, I decided to ponder and meditate and I realized I am not off base. I just need to chill and be more tolerant. Tolerant of those who choose to worship God in the way of being in Church. My form of worship is between me and God. It can be prayer. It can be meditation. It can be standing in awe at the wonders of nature out in the woods. To me they are all manifestations of God. I hear him in the stillness. Sometimes I just need to clear away the clutter and listen.

Now my wife and I are fine. My main point was that I accused her of being brainwashed but she is sincere and I know we follow the same God so if she speaks a little churchese, I will be OK with it. I wont be OK with legalism and judgementalness but her heart is good and she is not a judgemental person. She may get more from Church than I do but thats OK. I should take what I can from every experience and try to give to it at the same time. Living each day and moment at a time.

Her school is very much a Churchianity college so I should expect an influence. I think the people at her school are sincere dedicated Christians as are a lot of Churchgoers. I choose to be a free thinker and that is not promoted in much of Churchianity. Thats my main issue. That and pious legalism.

Oh and I was TOTALLY KIDDING about voting for John McCain. Whatever you think of Obama, McCain is 1000 times worse.

I wish I could vote for Kucinich. The trendier Obama gets the less I trust him but he is what we have.

This is Ponderous Man. Really Ponderous

OK. So I finally start to find a bit of inner peace in worship of Christ and practicing meditation (of a Buddhist nature). Now my wife goes back to a Christian College and she seems to start "talking in Churchese" and it makes me sick. I am worried. Could I be off base? Could I be heading down the road to destruction? Should I stop this meditation and get my butt back in a Church pew and do what I am told so I can feel more like a Christian? My heart says NO. I still dont feel far from Christ yet I feel farther from Churchianity than ever (though I will attend Church to appease the requirements of my wifes school). I will even try to take from it the good. I went to Baptist Church this week and there was some good in it. But I can say the same about Buddhism. I am theologically a bit unraveled about a fight I had with my wife this evening that had somewhat to do with a piousness I see in her just from registering at school. Can it be real if it changes her? Can it be right if she has to put on the Churchianity mask just to attend? Perhaps we were backslidden over the summer and now she is back with the Lord. I dont know. My Churchianity background is filled with fear. Fear of hell fire. So I am afraid. Maybe I should just go back so that I can have my fire insurance. Maybe I should vote for John McCain and preach to the filthy sinners. Maybe I should stop hanging out with my Buddhist friend and start hanging out with Pastors again.

I want to follow Christ. I just dont want to be who I was 5 years ago. If I met the me I was then, I would kick my own ass

Fiduciary Responsibility to Maximize Profits for Shareholders

This is the core. The blackened evil rotten core of capitalism. I know many will disagree but any entity that exists and is legally bound to maximize profits at all costs can and will kill, rape, pillage, destroy, outsource, and fuck over anyone who gets in its way of making a buck. They HAVE to. Its the LAW. They have to outsource to China. otherwise they can be sued by their shareholder for losing money.

This is the heart of modern capitalism. This is why companies throw away employees and customers like used tampons. This is why you get someone in India when you call for support. This is why everything is shit and made in China by 10 year olds for $5 a month.

If America is so gosh darn righteous why do we promote this system. This system of tyranny and slavery as Christian. Why are those who claim to be "of the Lord" some of the richest pigs on the planet. Not all but a lot.

I realize I have made some gross generalizations and I am actually not in a bad mood.

I was created to do more than "maximize profits" so some rich fuck can buy another yacht.

Anyway, I think I need to do some meditation and put this out of mind. I read an article that got me fired up. Now I misplaced it.

I do believe small businesess and employee owned companies (though often driven by the same greed mentality) can be good. I think that publicly traded corporations by nature have to be evil and can only do good if it will result in more $$$$$ in their pockets. Thats the law.

I want to clarify that most of the people who work for these corps are decent hard working people. They (we) me too are slaves to this. Though I dont work for a publicly traded company, I have and probably will again. Wage slavery is what it is. Sometimes screwing people for money just goes with the job description.

Todd Bentley Sex Scandal

http://endtimespropheticwords.wordpress.com/2008/08/16/todd-bentley-extra-marital-affair-with-female-member-of-staff/

BAM - He has been caught!!!!!!!!

Obama

I have found a good reason to vote for Obama. He hates mayonaise. Can we ask for more?


http://starbulletin.com/2008/05/29/features/memminger.html